Tuesday, February 15, 2011


     I am bored thinking of all the lifes stuff..so irritating ,so disgusting , lousy and too much...Hey i come to think why not burst all that am having right now in this idiot computer...see. its better this thing it won't make any complains nor it will surrender with your immaturity...pressed harder or soft still its there for you...Thank you my dear PC..now you are going to absorb everything  for me ..

bendt road    I really don't not know such year is not good for me....!! I am still on the second month of the year but seems
it doesn't mean a thing according to one song...I got so many fights from everywhere..inside and out..One fight after the other...I tell you ,it so tiring...i want to shout enoughhhhhhhhhhh ..please....am so very tired...give me a break..i can not almost tackle it..hoooo....whats this???  Please spare me the understanding that i needed it very much this days...while i have still my sanity..please hold on me...don't drop me i might not be formed again like a castle ...so fragile.

...Things are getting tough each day.,it requires ones  maturity , wisdom and courage and faith to GOd...Yeah, i have most of those ,just one thing which is not there ,..the maturity. This is very important yet i don't have this much., this is the naked truth. Thats why often times i am down, sad, lonely and blue i can not quantify things nor can i understand whats inside..You know there was even a time that im blackout..i wanted to end life..for it was not  good enough for me...i am so good to life but seems  not good to me....thats why am always asking my God to be with me always and  to hold my one hand that grasped on his hand. You know if its not only a sin ..if its only not a sin ...i have maybe done it..good ...,good.. that  spirituals teaching is deeply instilled in me...so am afraid to do it..It's not really good thing to do.. as if i am the loser...no wayyyyyyy..i will fight with you bullshit life...i won't accept  failure nor i would be defeated. With friends ,family  and with God..i can recover  slowly, slowly i can...I will overthrow you damn problems and not you who will overthrow me..never...

    Hoping, hoping, next days are better for me...Wishing, wishing,   life would really be that beautiful..
I know no one can cure myself but me only..No one can fully help but still me again..So i guess i should make friends with my own self....I should love myself first before loving others.I should not give my one million love to others,,,i should learn to save for myself  for i am left ..still i could manuever my life..

Tomorrow would never be a promise but the promise their is  still it would come whether we like it or not..Tomorrow is another hope...they said that as long as there is still thin thread of hope it is wrong to give up...as the song goes..don't give up on us baby...

LIFE...LIFE ..LIFE ..LIFE  please be serious with me...don't play around  am really tired na!!..
As the song goes...what a journey it has been
                              and the end is not in sight
                              but the stars are out tonight
                              and they're bound to guide my way....

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